Well, here we go!

So now that the cat's out of the bag I suppose I am free to blog about my current condition to my heart's content... which is nice, since I have wanted to several times in the past month.
Morning sickness and fatigue have so far left me simultaneously excited and miserable. I am thankful for these symptoms because so far they're the only physical proof I have that my baby is really in there. From what I understand it's common to feel doubtful about your pregnancy or fearful of miscarriage. I have felt both, and even over the past few days I've wondered if this was all somehow a huge mistake (although I don't see how that could be possible). So it is, in a way, comforting to at least feel pregnant.
The miserable part, I'm sure, explains itself. Let's just say I would not wish this on anyone... I am nauseous from the second I wake up to the second I go to sleep and can barely stumble through my work day and make it home without falling asleep at the wheel. At first I thought the fatigue was mostly due in part to quitting caffeine cold turkey (also the headaches-- alas, those are here to stay as well). But it has persisted too, slightly lessened, for the past four weeks and will probably continue for the next four.
Luckily I got some good tips from other mommies on how to handle my "morning" sickness, and reassurance that forcing chicken down my throat when I really don't want it isn't going to be good for anyone.
It's pretty crazy, this is not at all what we planned and certainly has been difficult to adjust to (at times I still feel really overwhelmed, not so much by the prospect of having a baby, but more at the lifetime of parenthood suddenly stretched out before me--if that makes sense) but the fact is it's hard not to be excited when you realize there's a little baby in there waiting to come out. I think I have adapted a little easier to the situation than Matt has, simply because I already feel like a mom and already wish I could meet my baby.
We have about 12 weeks to go until we can find out the sex-- which we are going to do-- and until our baby will develop ears and be able to hear us talking and recognize our voices. I can't wait for those milestones, or the first kick, or the first time I see the heartbeat! I mostly just want reassurance that he or she is really in there and doing just fine.
Anyway, that is all for now, I am sure I will have plenty more blogs to come.